February 2012
2 posts
Hipsters- I don’t hate on you, I really don’t. I think that your style is great! You look like you’re dressed to do a modern dance piece on 1970s NY muggers, and I dig it. But please, for Pete’s sake, hold both handle bars in your bike! No one gives a skinny jean if you can ride sans hand, but I’m sure your mama does!
January 2012
8 posts
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I had an amazing dream that this young production assistant told me that he was working on a production of “A View From the Bridge” with Dustin Hoffman and wanted me to play the young ingenue. I, of course, said yes and he said he’d see what I can do. Even in my dream I had the acting clout of a fish in tank at a Chinese buffet restaurant in North Carolina.
But I got it! I got...
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October 2011
2 posts
10 tags
Fuck you, puta!
Seriously, why doss every MTA woman have to be a bitch. Why? If you don’t like working in that shitty box (and I don’t blame you) DONT WORK THERE! But don’t add hate in your life and mine by being a bitch! MTA dudes are never as much of an asshole as the woman. I want to interview with the MTA just to see if I act like a total cunt, who can’t speak into the microphone...
10 tags
Hit it
When I was a kid, my brothers little league football league would have a carnival type thing in the winter, with a huge bonfire, a lot of greasy Mexican and America food, and every year they’d also buy a shitty car from some car pound for super super cheap. And they’d have a wooden and metal baseball bat you could pay $5 for 3 swings at the car. People would line up for that the most...
August 2011
6 posts
10 tags
Smoking fatty
I have a gripe. I saw a two ladies walk out of a gym. A young average build one and an older fatter one. I say fatter cause thats what she was. They were both sweaty. And the younger mb girl lights up a cig to which the fatter woman scolds in a Hispanic accent of some sort “you juz workout and you smoke?!? That don make sense.” I didn’t stay to hear the rest of the convo but I...
10 tags
Love in the time of war
I really wanted to get romantic with boyfriend last night. He asked if I wanted to watch a movie and I said yes thinking eventually we wouldn’t be watching it. We picked Glory, that civil war movie with Matthew Broderick, Carry Elves, Morgan Freedman, and Denzel Washington. I was into the movie but still more into gettin down. Then I thought if I get sexy right now, Dan will think either...
8 tags
Good lookin
I’m always slightly insulted when I wear a skirt and makeup and people say “Oh WOW, Kim, you look so different.” I mean for my job, I’m usually in workout clothes but it’s not THAT different, is it? I mean I didn’t transform from a MAN. I don’t have a huge bulge in my crotch, harry arms, and a five o clock shadow when I’m in my gym clothes. My hairs...
I didn't forget you
Hey my little tumblets! I just wanted you to know that I haven’t forgotten about you. I know it’s been a while since I made a text entry and you’ve all been checking tumblr in hopes I have written something amazing to sooth that itch for more Kim in your life. I’ve just been so busy the past couple weeks but things should be back on schedule now.
I’ve noticed an...
July 2011
12 posts
If I’m sitting in the corner two seater on the subway, purposefully on the outer seat because the car is empty enough that I can tell you by my seat choice that I don’t want you to sit next to me….don’t run right to the corner and sit next to me! Especially because there are plenty if other seats! And don’t start riffling through your backpack. I was enjoying a nice...
Old baby
My favorite kind of babies are the kind that look like disgruntled old people. Cause I totally feel that. If I had no say in what I ate, no say in where or when I go, and had to wait even 1 minute for you to clean the whatever out of my undies…I’d be disgruntled an tired of it too.
The worst part about fighting with your boyfriend, whom you live with in a studio apartment is having to silently do at home work in the same space….also having to poop. Cause the tv is not on, you know that he knows what’s going on when you go in the bathroom and the vent comes on, and it just overall leaves you in a vulnerable position. Really vulnerable.
4 tags
Just some thoughts I had walking.
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June 2011
4 posts
Accidental Attitude
I totally am blaming my bad attitude today on the fact that I hit my head on a chair last night laughing at a joke. It left a horn on my forehead. I look like a pissed off Mexican unicorn.
French fry fix
Okay, I’m gonna say it- I don’t get fat homeless people. I just have so much less sympathy for them. Someone- please- justify why I’m wrong and why I’m an asshole for saying this. I just think, you have all those fat reserves…you’re good for quite some time…
9 tags
A week off? Woah! I’m crazy busy….RIDING MY BIKE ALL OVER THE CITY!
YEAH BABY! do you know how much easier it is to fart on a bike than in a subway car? And air and no pandering and exercise and transportation- win win all around. Except for my ass, which is getting accustom to the seat, my legs which are getting scrapped by the petals, and my hands that are blistering from the...
May 2011
14 posts
Memorial Day
Woah- not even the Metro AM girl is out today. Going into the subway on a Memorial Day morning is bleak, everyone has a “loser who picked the short straw” swagger about them. Were the select few that work Memorial Day. A day reserved for the elite pencil pushers while us blue collars trudge through the 9-5s and train delays of a holiday.
7 tags
You know, I am gonna quit smoking, and not because I give a shit about my health, or their cost, or the wrinkles, but because my jerk off friends keep nagging or commenting every time I TRY to enjoy one. Well let me tell y’all something, friends, you so concerned about my health, you better not have any fat friends. I mean like NONE. Or you better be telling them to stop shovin that food...
8 tags
There are just not enough hours in the day to workout, write, work, and always look good doing it. Makeup and clothes so you look like one of those girls who gives a shit. As much as The Mexican me hates that Americans in general give a shit less about what they wear and treat their bodies, I have to say I’m half way in that category. I love taking care of my body, but I could give a fuck...
9 tags
I just remembered when I gave my frienamie a pregnant mouse as my senior high school drama classes secret santa gift. He was pissed. I wonder what ever happened to that poor mouse. I bet he got eaten by a snake. I wonder what happened to that snake. Acid reflux from digesting so many baby mouse bones I bet.
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Calo-rella.
Why do I continue to food fuck myself by looking up calories. Ugh. I looked in the mirror and saw Sofia Vergara, looked up some calories for food I ate the night before and suddenly I pouff puff turn into Rosanne.
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WatchThis man speaks truth. I almost gave him money just for that.
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Ugh. New gymemie. You know that person who goes to the same gym as you and for some reason they just annoy the shit out of you and you are pretty sure you do the same to them. Yeah, well I got a new one. I was using the cable weights to do some tricep extensions. My hands were on both handles. This is pretty normal to do both arms at the same time. And this lady with a do rag on and fanny pack...
6 tags
Just watched Pink Flamingos for the first time ever today. Seriously the screen presence of Divine is amazing. She has such a calm confidence about her and is super graceful but is bat shit CRAZY. All the actors that John Waters cast are nuts and I love it. Not just the characters, but the actors themselves are all just a little skewed. It’s brilliant. His films really have a great place in...
About to walk the AIDS Walk. There is Nothing better than that feeling when you’re about to crusade 6.2 miles for a GREAT cause at a time that you would never even think about getting up normally on a Sunday. You got in late but you’re in, raised a great amount of money….for having sent one e-mail only days before the big event, but you aren’t walking with a big fat $0 next...
Baby Money
Oyi! What the fuck with the lady asking for money with her kid in a stroller. As far as I’m concerned she’s a jerk. She has a purse, okay looking clothes, he kid is in a stroller. Seriously?!? Thats Baby exploitation. I’m gonna save that baby. Next time I run down the steps of Fulton St subway station I’m gonna snatch that baby Warren Moon style and take it home to feed and...
Gay nags
I noticed that when the newspapers have an article on gay marriage, they usually use a visual of two women. Why not two dudes. That’s sexist. Or typical of women to want to get married depends where you stand on the whole thing.
It’s pretty pathetic how excited I get about a seat on the subway. “noes my time to shine” and I go for it.
4 tags
April 2011
1 post
4 tags
4/5 train
I’m done with people on the 4/5 train at borough hall. Idiots. Pure unadulterated idiots. I want to create a a blog on fantasies people have and what they would do to assholes they encounter on the subway. I kinda acted one out yesterday. I was trying to get off a crowded 4 train and, of course, about 10 assholes were trying to get on, not letting me off. And I was in the middle of the...
February 2011
8 posts
